As responsible employers, parents and friends, we have an obligation to correct the mistakes of other people in order to increase their personal success. The task before us is how to correct a deficiency without damaging the delicate ego that can sometimes get in the way. Too often people criticize the behavior of someone without providing a solution and this is dangerous because it becomes a personal attack on the person who seeks only to their demerit. constructive criticism involves pointing out their weaknesses and offering a solution to remedy it. In order to give constructive criticism, we must find solutions to problems before they remember the person. In this way, we effectively separate the behavior from the ego and preserve the relationship in the process.
Here are some strategies for giving constructive criticism:
1. Never criticize while you are angry with the person. If emotions are controlling your actions, thus avoiding any kind of criticism. It becomes too easy to use that criticism as the opportunity to make a personal attack the other person when emotions are high. Distance yourself and regain your composure before you address a behavior that needs correcting.
2. Offer a better solution. Know the difference between dislike a certain behavior, because to disagree with your personal preference antipathy towards conduct in favor of a more efficient or correct way to do something. Avoid making criticism and then groped for support with emotional appeals, because the problem then becomes a matter of personal preference and conflicting egos. Instead, use the power of logic to show the person that there is really a better way of doing the same thing that will improve their own success and productivity.
3. Always let the person save face. This means respecting the person, even if they did something completely inappropriate. The psychological consequences of embarrassing or disrespecting someone in front of their peers is very serious. It 's so serious in fact, that embarrassment was a factor in 80% of all violent incidents in the workplace and in schools. The criticism is a personal and private process that is not shared with anyone else. Furthermore, it is equally important not to make clear to others who are working or going to give criticism. Have someone come to your office in front of their peers can be equally damaging as to criticize in public. Keep it very confidential and compliance needs of your party to save face before their peers.
4. Focus on the problem, not the person. When constructive criticism, be sure to stay focused on the resolution of the problem not the person. The problem is an objective problem that we can work together to improve both your interests. Focus on the subject, however, will always be interpreted as a personal attack against them, even if it is meant to be. Personal attacks are always followed by resentment and anger, which can actually be more harmful in the long run because it can cause deep resentment, which in turn may adversely affect morale, saboteur or illegal behavior and passive resistance. Remember that the person has feelings and these feelings can easily be broken by a wrong approach. Every time you give criticism, follow the golden rule to attack the problem while being kind on the person.
5. Empathize with their position. Empathy is the ability to step in the shoes of the person and see the world from their perspective. Sometimes we forget what being the new person at work because we have grown accustomed to a certain procedure or routine that is second nature to us. Remember that people do not always see things as you do and part of being a good teacher is that you can understand the position of the person and work with them at their level, not really.
6. Never label the person. Attaching a label on the person criticized the negative approach is inadequate because it dehumanizes them, making it easier for you to be angry with them and demoralized.
7. Focus on the future not the past. Blame someone for their past behavior does nothing but create conflict. The past is over and your main concern is that it does not happen in the future. So instead of dwelling on past behavior, use it as a teaching tool in order to improve in the future.
8. Use words to fill your critical softening. Softening words are designed to "soften" the statements sound harsh .. Softeners work because they leave much room for interpretation of the statement that follows it. Examples of softeners are: "I believe," "assume," "appears," "I believe", etc. So instead of making a harsh statement as: "You're relationship is terrible." Replace with a criticism softened as, "It seems to me that this part of your relationship could use some revision." The psychological effect of a declaration wording can lead to a greater amount of persuasion and conflict prevention.
9. Give them an opportunity to correct their behavior. This is an important step for any criticism, it operates at two different levels. At the first level, giving them the opportunity to correct their behavior or actions allows them to take responsibility for their behavior and reinforces the point that they must be held accountable for their actions. At the second level, giving them the opportunity to correct their behavior gives them the opportunity to redeem himself and save face with you, which makes it easier for them to conduct their past behind and move one.
10. Constructive criticism is a sign of compassion. Criticism is often associated as a bad thing, because it is often misused as a means of transport for personal attacks. However, constructive criticism is a good gift because the central message behind the criticism is that the person cares enough to want them to succeed in the future. Constructive criticism is one of the main tests that separate the regular people as true friends care. Taking care of people will be honest with you and threaten to lead to conflict if they believe that their constructive criticism will help improve your life. Make sure the person knows your constructive criticism is done because you care for them and that you value your relationship with them. They respect you more for being honest with them.
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